A PUBLIC DISPLAY OF AFFECTION

It took a while for Sam and our daughter, Lindsey, to realize that they had spent a night together before they actually met. An avalanche near Alta had closed the road, stranding the skiers in the ski lodge. It was a close, but not so intimate overnight affair involving 165 people, still in their ski clothes. As they calculated it later, Sam was with his buddies, about 2 groups away from where Lindsey and her friends camped out on the floor to sleep. They chose to stay put and not wander around. You just never know what kind of people you will meet in a ski lodge when you are stranded after an avalanche.

Two weeks later at a ward party at BYU Lindsey spotted the Alta ski lift ticket on Sam’s parka, recognized that it was the same as hers, and realized that they had shared the same avalanche experience. Lindsey had some recent trust issues dating men and wasn’t looking for a new romance, having just ended a relationship. The ex-boyfriend was named Rory and whenever we talked about him it sounded like we all had rhotacism, and could not pronounce the letter “R.” Maybe it had something to do with the fact that Rory failed to mention that he was previously married.

So, Lindsey was a little gun shy and took it slow with Sam. They were both serious about academics and maintained a respectable relationship. They had voiced their views about the immaturity of the epidemic of public affection among their younger peers at BYU. Despite this view, their own romance blossomed and they were soon planning a summer wedding in Idaho Falls to be followed by a honeymoon in San Francisco. At the end of their honeymoon, they were to join us in West Yellowstone, Montana, for an evening at the Playmill Theater.

James and Jamie, our two youngest children, were with us when we arrived two hours early and stopped at Taco Bell, located at the time in the building housing the Yellowstone IMAX Theater. When we spotted Sam and Lindsey leaving the IMAX, they were already outside, heading for their car. We watched as they put packages in the trunk. Sam, who is very much a gentleman, opened Lindsey’s door. Lindsey turned to thank him with a major lip-lock that did not end until they were comfortably snuggled into the front seat. Horrified, Jamie and James looked at each other, then they looked at us, and James suddenly dove under the table. I stuck my head down to where I could see him and ask, “James, why are you hiding? You haven’t done anything wrong!” Still, he was afraid of being seen and wouldn’t come out until I announced that the honeymooners had driven away. As we enjoyed our nachos, I provided them with two options. I told them that when we met the love birds at the Playmill we could immediately jump them and tell them what we had just witnessed, or we could set them up. The vote was unanimous — set them up!

The lovebirds appeared and we all stood in line to get into the Playmill. After a few minutes of visiting, I casually asked them if they still felt the same way about overt expressions of affection in public. They reassured me that their views were unchanged and that kind of behavior was far beneath their mature standards. I told them that I was greatly relieved because we had just seen an overly romantic couple embarrass a parking lot full of tourists by embracing and kissing as they settled into the front seat of their car. I explained that it was comforting to know that it was not them — even though the car was the same year, make, model, and color as theirs. It was also quite a coincidence that the car had the same Idaho license plate as well. What great fun— setting them up turned out to be so much better than I had expected. I began to understand the meaning of the promises of joy and rejoicing in my posterity.

Ever vigilant,

Roger H. Tall, M.D.UPSTREAM IDAHO A VIEW FROM THE HEADWATERS OF THE SNAKE RIVER WHERE EVERYTHING ELSE IS DOWNSTREAM